To get to Livingston, you've got to go down the highway," Bush says during a recent "town meeting" in Great Falls, Mont. "And you go through the cattle guard. And you turn left. And go through another cattle guard."

Bush chuckles, races through his setup, then hurtles into his punch line.

"And a fellow comes back and says, 'Hey, what color uniforms do those cattle guards have on?' "

Get it? Like, the doofus in the joke thought "cattle guards" were people (protecting the cows), as opposed to steel rails (placed at fence openings to stop cows from walking onto roads).

The crowd is silent. Bush's face freezes in a guess-you-had-to-be-there smile.

Last Wednesday Bush began a speech in Columbus, Ohio, by mentioning the international body-building competition that was held there the previous weekend. "When the vice president heard I was coming, he asked me to pick up an application form for next year's competition," the president joked, and what better image to begin a speech on energy policy?

At a town meeting in Little Rock last month, Bush was joined onstage by Gloria Bennett, a part-time food inspector.

"I'm from De Queen, Arkansas," she told the president.

"That," Bush replied, nodding, "is right next to De King."

Silence gave way to groans, which became chuckles and, finally, applause.

In a session with European print reporters last month, Bush seemed compelled to tell a German journalist named Klaus, mid-interview, that "my roommate in college, by the way, was named Dieter."

Bush often appears with an "expert" who supports his Social Security plan -- some adviser, professor or smarty-pants whom the president likes to use as a foil to contrast with his own academic record. "I'm a C-student," Bush said proudly in Louisville last week. "He's the PhD. He's the adviser. I'm the president. What does that tell you?"

Bush has always liked to project a common-folk demeanor, but only occasionally mentioned his slacker past during his first term. Now his repertoire includes frequent references to how he paid little attention in class while in college.

When a panelist in Tampa used the word "multitasking," Bush, with a hint of sarcasm, commended her for using a "nice long word, 'multitasking.' Very good. Inject a little intellectual strength in the conversation."

Bush has used self-deprecating humor in tense environments, such as during his trip to Europe last month, a delicate diplomatic jaunt. On his arrival in Brussels, Bush spoke of Benjamin Franklin's visit to Europe two centuries ago. He quoted a writer who said Franklin's reputation "was more universal than Leibniz or Newton, Frederick or Voltaire, and his character more beloved and esteemed than any or all of them. The observer went on to say, 'There was scarcely a peasant or a citizen who did not consider him as a friend to humankind.'

"I have been hoping for a similar reception. But Secretary Rice told me I should be a realist."

The crowd ate this up and the transatlantic ice was cracked slightly, if not thawed.

And Bush demonstrates again that Andrew Card is not the highest ranking card in this White House. (Get it? That's a play on the chief of staff's last name?)

Stop it! Enough already!

Source: Washington Post

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