reyonthehill

I have received some flak for my rant against Philly fans yesterday, so let me continue...

Philadelphia is an elite world-class city, but it is not New York or Boston. Philadelphia is analogous to the ugly girl at the party that you wind up going home with because there was no one else to choose from. The ugly girl is just happy to be invited to the dance. And that is what Philadelphia sports teams are good at -- getting a ride to the dance, making a fool of oneself, and spending the rest of the night puking into a toilet.

You cannot always be the champion; contending for a championship is all you can ask for...

- The Phillies lost the World Series (in dramatic fashion) in 1993, but they won in 1980;
- The Flyers lost in 1997, but they have two Stanley Cups in their history (including one over my Sabres);
- The Eagles lost the Super Bowl in 2004 (and 1980), but they were the cream of the crop in the late 40s; and
- The Sixers lost in 2001, but they had a championship team in the first-half of the 80s.

And what do Philly fans do to show support for their hard-working teams? They spit at them; they boo them; and they bring shame to the sports they cheer for.

Note: I have previously blogged that Philadelphia is my "second home," which I still believe, further bolstered by the fact that the Sixers were originally the Syracuse Nationals.

If you like hockey -- and you should, unless you're a pissant from Philadelphia* -- then you will truly enjoy highlights from one of the greatest hockey games in recent history, the first game of the Sabres-Senators second-round playoff series two years ago (watch the clock)...

* In that case, you'd be a Flyers fan; go fuck yourself.

The historic Buffalo Sabres game yesterday, played outdoors in suburban Buffalo, termed the "Winter Classic," provided much better photographs than it did gameplay.

Image: Yahoo! / Dave Sandford / Getty Images

The ice surface was obviously choppy, and covered with snow, but it was fun to watch nonetheless. Maybe if Lindy Ruff had not chosen Maxim Afinogenov as the third shooter in the shoot-out, and instead picked, maybe, Thomas Vanek, then maybe I would be blogging how terrific the game was, but I choose not to be a Monday morning quarterback, or in this case, a fourth period back-up goalie.

Last night, I was in attendance to root for my hometown Buffalo Sabres as they trashed the local San Jose Sharks, 7-1...

The Sabres only come to town once every three years.

At the end of the game, I summarized the evening, let's say, concisely...

Amidst Bill Simmons' ongoing quest for the "longest chat ever," he stated that he would return as a fan of the NHL if the league "completely re-invented [itself] - 22 teams, 11 in Canada, 11 in USA." Alright.

Bill may not know this, but I have already proposed a fix for the beleaguered and embattled league, a plan that called for 24 teams (15 U.S., 9 Canadian). Eliminating four of the U.S. cities that I proposed would ultimately prove difficult and outwardly harsh, and finding two additional Canadian cities seems nothing more than arbitrary.

I admire the Sports Guy but he is way-off on this one, and I wouldn't have said anything, but then, again, I have a blog.

- The executives of the company that nearly leveled the city of Buffalo (and bankrupted the Buffalo Sabres hockey team) are finally headed to prison.

- Karl Rove, the GOP genius, "leaves a lame-duck president suffering from low approval ratings, an unpopular war in Iraq and public rejection in the 2006 elections."

- And even worse, "it is apparent that the Rove era may not broaden the movement begun by Barry Goldwater, Richard Nixon and Ronald Reagan but could instead mark the end point of a period of Republican majority."

- Hillary Clinton's archives from her days as First Lady will not be "released until after the 2008 presidential election." And then we'll finally get to the bottom of who killed Vince Foster.

- And coming soon to your workplace: Google health. Hopefully it will help cut down the premiums.

- The Buffalo Sabres have lost both of their captains to free agency. I think this is a good thing in the long run -- the price-tag was way too high for a small-market team still rebuilding following bankruptcy. When it comes to my sports teams, I always support a long-term strategy.

- Four years ago today, Bush said, "Bring 'em on."

- McCain's campaign may end prematurely. Well, considering his age, it may not be that premature. Could McCain pull-off a Clintonesque "Comeback Kid, er, Geezer?"

- It seems that six months of advanced notice still wasn't enough time for AT&T to be prepared for the iPhone.

- And Google, for some reason or another (only Google knows for sure), has taken (or had taken) some editorial stance in favor of the billion-dollar health care industry. Google's motto has always been "Don't be evil," but that only applies when the publicly-traded company's profits are not on the line.

So my jinx on the Sabres worked. Great. (So this is why people own guns.)

There are a lot of stories about how the NHL is broken (it isn't, but it is poorly managed), and I offer a few suggestions. The main reason the NHL is conceived at being "broken" is because of the tv contract (which is dire, I understand) and the fact that ESPN refuses to give airtime to cover the league/sport (because ESPN is solely interested in furthering its own interests, not the interest of sports, in general; that is why ESPN now airs highlights of MLS and arena football -- you've read that correctly, arena football -- because the network now owns the rights to air those leagues' games, and airing highlights increases potential viewership; however, the conflict of interest that is ESPN is a whole other blog, and I will get to that, eventually).

Now, how to fix the NHL... contraction. Yep, contraction. A whopping nine teams (but relocating three of them).

I would bring back the two conferences, you know, the Campbell and the Wales. (Screw the Eastern and Western conferences -- why did the NHL want to replicate the NBA anyway? Both the NFL and MLB have non-geographic-based conferences, and the last I checked, all is well.) However, I would keep the conferences geographic-based.

Wales Conference (Eastern) -- 12 teams (no divisions)

Boston Bruins
Buffalo Sabres
Montreal Canadiens
New Jersey Devils
New York Islanders
New York Rangers
Ottawa Senators
Philadelphia Flyers
Pittsburgh Penguins
Toronto Maple Leafs

Hamilton, Ontario (new team, relocated from contracted team)
Quebec, Quebec (new team, relocated from contracted team)

Campbell Conference (Western) -- 12 teams (no divisions)

Calgary Flames
Chicago Blackhawks
Colorado Avalanche
Columbus Blue Jackets
Dallas Stars
Detroit Red Wings
Edmonton Oilers
Minnesota Wild
St. Louis Blues
San Jose Sharks
Vancouver Canucks

Winnipeg, Manitoba (new team, relocated from contracted team)

Contracted
Anaheim Ducks
Atlanta Thrashers
Carolina Hurricanes
Florida Panthers
Los Angeles Kings
Nashville Predators
Phoenix Coyotes
Tampa Bay Lightning
Washington Capitals

Season
The season would start November 1. Each team would play their conference rivals five times (alternating two or three at home and two or three away each year) and each team in the other conference once (alternating one home/away each year). This would be a total of 67 games. Teams would play up to fourteen games per month, and the season would end on the last day of March.

Playoff
The playoffs would start at the beginning of April. The top six teams in each conference would make the playoffs. The top two seeds would get a bye. The first round would be a best-of-five series (using a 2-2-1 format). Subsequent rounds would be re-seeded and be best-of-seven (using a 2-2-1-1-1 format). The Stanley Cup would be played in the month of May.

One note on the Buffalo Sabres as I jinx them thoroughly in the process...

In the last ten years (nine seasons because one was canceled due to lockout), the Sabres have reached the final four (the conference semifinals) four times. In that same stretch, only the Colorado Avalanche (formerly the Quebec Nordiques) match that number.

4x -- Colorado Avalanche, Buffalo Sabres
3x -- New Jersey Devils, Dallas Stars, Detroit Red Wings, Anaheim Mighty Ducks
2x -- Philadelphia Flyers, Carolina Hurricanes, Toronto Maple Leafs, Ottawa Senators

The Sabres reached the conference finals in '97-'98, where they lost to the Washington Capitals, and the following '98-'99 season, where they defeated the Toronto Maple Leafs, ultimately losing to the Dallas Stars in the Stanley Cup finals. Since then, the Sabres have reached near-rock-bottom, including the team going bankrupt due to the illegal doings of Adelphia and the Rigas family, only to climb back up to the top of the league, earning the President's Trophy this season.

The Sabres were in the conference final last year, losing to the Carolina Hurricanes in seven games, and are back again this season seeking revenge on the Ottawa Senators. (And now that I've jinxed my beloved Sabres, I will shut the hell up.)

- The top republican in the House says that GOP support of Bush's plan in Iraq will last three to four months. Let's hope each-and-every troop survives the next three to four months.

- The City of Berkeley is "guaranteeing a summer job for every resident 14 to 23 years old." And people say Berkeley is crazy.

- Polls mean nothing. However, early polls indicate that the top three democrat White House contenders (Clinton, Obama, Edwards) lead the top three republicans (Giuliani, McCain, Romney) in all nine potential scenarios. It probably doesn't help matters for the GOP that Bush is currently at an all-time low of 28 percent approval.

- And the Sabres advance.