Lessons From Europe Archive

• Europe Lesson No. 5: The Euro Isn’t Real Money

  The Eurodollar isn’t real money. The Eurodollar is like Disney money, or even better, like Itchy & Scratchy money. It’s not real — it’s like being in some fantasy world where everything is so much cheaper than you’d expect. The Euro lingers. And you will spend all of it. When you return home, that is [...]

• Europe Lesson No. 4: Pharmacists Rule

  Pharmacists rule. They rule the street. The flashing green cross on one block, the flashing red on the next. You know exactly where to go when you start sniffling. My wife and I both got head colds while on our honeymoon. I got it first and then I gave it to my new wife. As [...]

• Europe Lesson No. 3: McDonald’s Is The Burger King

  McDonald’s is the burger king. First, you notice people with McDonald’s bags or McDonald’s fountain soda cups walking around town. (Nah, it couldn’t be; I don’t see one.) Then, you see a couple people on a park bench eating french fries out of a McDonald’s box. (Turning your head, you don’t see anything close by.) [...]

• Europe Lesson No. 2: Wine Is Cheaper Than Coke

  Wine is cheaper than Coke. And not just cheap wine, all wine. And not just at nice restaurants, everywhere. In fact, the price of Coke is so outlandish, it makes it nearly impossible to not purchase a bottle of wine for every meal (except breakfast). My new wife and I just got used to the [...]

• Europe Lesson No. 1: Everyone Smokes

  Everyone smokes. And I mean everyone. Your mother smokes, your grandmother smokes, your sister and brother smoke, your nephew smokes. Your friends smoke, your cousins smoke, your coworkers smoke. And, yes, you smoke. You smoke before dinner, during dinner, and of course, after dinner with coffee. You smoke during lunch and breakfast too. You smoke [...]

• Lessons From Europe

  Over the next few days (and I mean it this time; I know I have a habit of saying something along the lines of, “I will discuss this tomorrow,” and then never do, but not this time; I hope), I will go over a few things that I have learned about life in Europe from [...]